forty neon buddhas
A friend once asked me where the neon buddha came from. In reply, I almost said Toledo. More accurately, he’s an avatar—sometimes a surrogate for me and what I’ve done or would like to do, both ordinary and extraordinary, and sometimes an everyman who’s definitely not me. The neon buddha is also like the Travelocity garden gnome—a little naive or overwhelmed by the world, but always game for adventure. And perhaps he’s like R. Crumb’s Mr. Natural—an underground sage who likes to have fun and can’t resist a double meaning. Or he’s like John Berryman’s “dream song” everyman Henry, sometimes too serious for his own good. I’ve written many hundreds of these haiku-like poems (perhaps similar to the Spanish greguería form), which have unfolded as a surreal sort of personal mythology.
the neon buddha says the word over and over vestibule
neon buddha can’t get no satisfaction but he knows his grammar
neon buddha is running with the deviled eggs
he is woman hear him roar neon buddha
neon buddha’s finger breaks through the toilet paper
the neon buddha dies again and again in the rose garden
riverrun the neon buddha and old it’s
the neon buddha sometimes confuses what’s on his mind with what’s on his head
to see what it’s like the neon buddha licks the Taj Mahal
deciding to procrastinate later neon buddha
coming to the garage with an axe to grind neon buddha
as luck would have it the neon buddha’s lottery ticket didn’t win
foreign trip neon buddha practices saying no way, José
neon buddha beats his wife at tiddlywinks
filial piety the neon buddha looks it up
playing second fiddle in the Solipsist Marching Band neon buddha
wishing everyone a Jiminy Christmas neon buddha
no one laughs at his droll jokes neon buddha
no one laughs at his troll jokes either neon buddha
neon buddha on the library steps reading between the lions
giving 110 percent at the mathematics convention neon buddha
neon buddha tells the waitress she has a nice figure of speech
checking the oil of forgetfulness neon buddha
the drinkability of whatever beer that is neon buddha
neon buddha crazy like a fox reporter
bear market the neon buddha takes a bath
traffic light the neon buddha plays air guitar
you know what the last line will be neon buddha
neon buddha thinks that all good children go to 7-Eleven
neon buddha asks the comedy club stage manager who’s on first
neon buddha wants to be an absolute monarch butterfly
neon buddha says it’s not just for breakfast anymore Dos Equis
at his favourite deli the neon buddha asks for the super salad
neon buddha misreads the bar sign please wait to be sated
neon buddha says making toast is still cooking
last day of the year neon buddha’s resolutions in invisible ink
finding just a spoon in the road neon buddha
the neon buddha builds a better mouse trap at Disneyland
bowling night the neon buddha strikes again
if you see the neon buddha on the road kill him
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