August 6

Slept late

Had some good dreams

Five star

Or maybe four

I don’t know

I didn’t sleep too good.

Then I pulled back the bedclothes

Threw on my bathrobe

and clambered

In bare feet

To the bathroom.


So I got undressed

And exposed myself to the morning.


I urinated.


The shower was good ’n hot

And I took too long

Thinking

I leaned against the grimy wet tiles

Head down.

The water streamed down my face.

It got in my eyes.


When I was done,

I got out

And broke the shower door

Maybe I’m clumsy

But I don’t think so.


I toweled myself dry

Still fighting to keep awake

I hung up my damp towel

As neatly as possible

I don’t know why . . .

And pulled my bathrobe back on.


I went back to my room

The floor was metal cold

And I got dressed.

It didn’t take too long.

I put on yesterday’s socks

And shirt and such.

Why? ’Cause it didn’t matter.


Then I went and had some breakfast

Bacon and eggs and toast ’n jam.

And then I threw up.




Next thing I knew it was time to go

So they took me to the courtyard

And shot me.



From Ninety-Seven Poems, and previously published, in a slightly different version, in The Stuttering Priest, 1984.