Getting It Out of My System

First published (in a slightly different form) in the Seattle Times, Sunday sports commentary, 26 July 2020, page B2, on the announcement of the National Hockey League Seattle team name, Seattle Kraken. +

Well, it’s the kracken of dawn, and I don’t want this opportunity to fall through the krackens, so I’m kracken down, and kracken the whip, takin’ the first kracken at kracken jokes. It’s a hard nut to kracken, but it’s kracken me up. Hope all the krack heads at the krack house are kracken a smile, cuz you gotta be kracken a few eggs to be makin’ this omelet. Hope the city isn’t kracken under the strain of all my wise-krackens, or kracken apart over its hockey team’s krackenjack new name. Get kracken, Seattle!

Michael Welch, Sammamish