If You’re Haikuing and You Know It

by Michael Dylan Welch



You’ve been doing haiku wrong all along.

You’ve been doing haiku wrong all along.

If they’re five-seven-fives

They will surely give me hives.

You’ve been doing haiku wrong all along.



A variation:


If you’re happy and you know it, write haiku.

If you’re happy and you know it, write haiku.

But if they’re five-seven-fives

They will surely give me hives.

If you’re happy and you know it, write haiku.



And how about this—sing it hurriedly to force the third and fourth lines into the original rhythm:


You’ve been doing tanka wrong all along.

You’ve been doing tanka wrong all along.

If they’re five-seven-five-seven-seven

They will surely banish you from heaven.

You’ve been doing tanka wrong all along.



Previously unpublished.